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7.27.2011

Dildo/Pussy Thrower

Sometimes I come across a term that is absolutely perfect for an application other than its originally intended usage.

I submit two such terms for your review, Dear Reader:

1. Dildo (noun) - A man who's only redeeming qualities are a pulse and an erect penis. As in: "He's gorgeous, but that guy is a dildo."

You may find the Dildo referring to himself as a "player" (or, more harshly "womanizer," for those of the hetero persuasion) but we find that this gives too much credit to his ability to instigate casual sexual interactions. Truly, this is the guy that admirers will speak of in harsh terms, except where his availability and virility are concerned. Typically, he is found to have few positive personality traits.

2. Pussy Thrower (noun) - A woman who pursues any and every technique for making herself sexually available to a desirable male. As in: "I was at the bar with my date, and this girl I *thought* was my friend came over and totally tried to steal him...she's such a Pussy Thrower."

We find the Pussy Thrower most often in situations where there is one sexually desirable male, and multiple women who may be interested in bedding said male. The Pussy Thrower is the girl who will stay longest at the bar/party/wedding reception in the hopes that her patience will pay off. She is also likely to behave in the most overtly sexual ways in a group of women to be confident that she is the only one absorbing the lecherous attentions of the one (or more) male(s) in the surrounding area.

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