Excuse Me, You Deceptive Motherfuckers...

But how many times do I have to say that I hate being lied to?

Now, I don't know what kind of a "troop withdrawal" this is, but the last time I checked, sending MORE TROOPS...35,000 MORE, in fact, constitutes something more like a "surge" to me.

Now, before you light your torches and storm the gates of the White House, let's take a look at the mitigating information...

hmmm...

...spokesman says it's "not related"...
...replacements...
...maintain heightened troop levels...

...and I'm still not seeing something that looks like unencumbered data. When the Pentagon starts to characterize and preemptively excuse its actions like a drunken Paris Hilton, I start to wonder what the real deal is.

And then I wonder why the politicians go through all the rhetoric (even though I love the rhetoric). Why bother? Have the Democrats been reading the news over the past few years? Because if they had, they might have noticed that our current administration doesn't give a shit about popular opinion, civil rights, the US Constitution, or even legality. So why would Congressional legislation, or even the pending presidential election, stop these crazies from acting on their own selfish motives?

Consistency, people!

But, let's not forget that Dick is in Baghdad straightening everything out. I imagine his conversations go a little something like this:

Anyone Other Than Dick Cheney: "Mr. Cheney, welcome to Baghdad."

Dick: "Listen, Raghead, I'm not here to chat you up or take you hunting. I'm here to let you know that if you don't clean this up, we will."

AOTDick: "Mr. Cheney, I really resent you calling me a "raghead"."

Dick: "Shut up, Towelhead, and start making some peace!"

AOTDick: "Mr. Cheney, we're doing the best we can. We just need more time."

Dick: "What do I run, a clock store? Your time is up, Towelhead, and if you don't have things under control by December 2007, we're going to start taking away things that you care about."

AOTDick: "What do you mean by that? Are you threatening me?"

Dick: "I'm not threatening you! I'm just telling you that if you don't have peace in Iraq by Christmas, then Santa isn't coming."

AOTDick: "Mr. Cheney, I'm a Muslim. Santa doesn't come ever, and there is no Christmas."

Dick: "Well, no wonder it's so fucked up here! What you people need is a good Christmas party, with lots of spiked egg nog, and presents for everybody! Doesn't that sound good?"

AOTDick: "Mr. Cheney, I think you're missing the point..."

Dick: "Missing the point? No. I'm not missing the point. The point is this: Either you enforce peace and prosperity in this country, or I WILL!"